Vipe-Free America!
News – Resources – Protection
Who Are We?
Vipe-Free America is the center of the online blood safety movement. Our purpose is to stop the spread of the vampire virus EBL-4.
What is a “vipe?”
After 24 to 72 hours of infection in a human body, EBL-4 (European Bat Lyssavirus-4) manifests as Virally Induced Hematophagic Predation Syndrome. Because of the acronym VIHPS, security and medical professionals have referred to the infected as “vipes.”
Are people infected with VIHPS vampires that have risen from the grave?
No. They’re worse.
The vampires in most movies, games, television and other media can subsist by sucking a little bit of human blood, or even survive on animal blood. To make a new vampire, they need to drain the body totally and refill it with vampire blood. This is not the case with VIHPS.
EBL-4 is a virus that is transferred through saliva and blood. If a vampire bites a victim and draws blood, it is all but guaranteed that the victim will develop VIHPS as well. There is no cure. The fact that these medical vampires don’t have fangs and aren’t cold to the touch should not reassure you.
There. Is. No. Cure.
What are the symptoms of VIHPS?
In the first three days of infection, the virus propagates and the human body alters in response.
- Nausea
- Vomiting
- Dizziness
- Full-body muscle aches
- Thirst for fresh human blood
- Sensitivity to sunlight
- Sensitivity to sound
- Sensitivity to smells
- Paranoia
- Uncontrollable anger
- Increased libido
- Faster metabolism
- Aversion to people from their pre-infection lives
As the virus changes the body, more symptoms appear:
- Increased strength
- Increased coordination
- Resistance to blunt force trauma
- Rapid tissue healing
- Better night vision
- Improved smell
- Improved hearing
- Lack of reason
- Lack of judgement
- Lack of willpower
- Lack of remorse
- Addiction to living human blood directly from a wound
How many vipes are there?
By the time you are finished reading this page, it’s highly likely there will be another vipe in the world. Each individual is a disease vector capable of infecting others at their whim. At a minimum, a vipe must feed on blood at least once a week. This results in 52 victims a year, each of whom must feed on 52 more. This doubling works out to millions of vipes in months, and enough to cover the planet in just 32 weeks unless they are culled.
That is the minimum. There is no upper limit to how many infections a vipe can transfer in a single night. They merely need to get close enough to a victim to bite hard enough to break the skin.
All evidence suggests the first case of VIHPS was Dr. Jessica Ulan, infected about four years ago. Heroic individuals removing vipes as a threat or killing themselves once they realize their condition are the only reasons civilization has not been overrun.
How do I identify a vipe?
The symptoms listed above are the best way to tell whether or not someone is infected. Anyone can be infected regardless of race, religion, socioeconomic status, or nationality. Further complicating the issue is that vipes often conceal their status. Because VIHPS is a newly discovered disease, some vipes may not even have a name for their condition, or be aware how often they are infecting others.
A vipe about to feed may exhibit other telltale behaviors:
- Isolating victims by inviting them to a remote location alone
- Luring victims by offering a ride home or to another location
- Luring victims with the promise of sexual favors
- Seeming unusually pliant or interested in anything the victim says
- Owning restraints such as handcuffs or rope
- Owning a vehicle that is set to off-grid travel so as not to be tracked
- Owning a vehicle with a spacious trunk
- Carrying weapons to force compliance
I think someone I know is a vipe. What should I do?
Our FAQ covers many recommended procedures. We boil it down to 3 steps.
- Do not let the vipe know you suspect them. Vipes are capable of killing humans with their bare hands, or infecting them with a simple bite.
- Stack the deck in your favor. Avoid confrontations until you know you have them outnumbered and outgunned. Even if you have called the police and they are sending a SWAT team, you will want to maintain the element of surprise until the best possible moment.
- Do not give them the opportunity to bite. This is critical, and you will have to follow this rule more desperately than #1 or #2. If you are bitten, you may survive, but forever more you will harm innocent people, up to and including everyone you love. The best recourse is never to allow yourself to be left alone with a vipe.
These are the three critical steps. Note that we did not list confronting the vipe. That step is not for everyone.
What if I have no choice but to get physical with a vipe?
We must emphasize that this should be your last resort. We at Vipe-Free America cannot encourage violence that violates local, state, or federal laws regarding the use of force for self-defense.
DO:
- Use a vehicle to get away. Vipes can run faster than humans.
- Use weapons to keep them off you. Punching a vipe will have little to no effect.
- Use friends to outnumber the vipe. A mob of villagers evens the odds for any vampire.
- Aim blows or firepower at their head. Non-lethal blows to the head are more painful and lethal blows are more likely to damage critical systems.
DON’T:
- Get their blood on you. If it gets in a scratch or wound, you will be infected.
- Get their saliva on you. A vipe spitting at you is a deadly threat.
- Think your car is a refuge. Vipes can use their superior strength to tip over cars. From there, breaking the window and dragging you out is easy.
- Think one bullet will be enough. Multiple reports say vipes have kept causing bodily harm to police even after 5-10 bullets to the torso. Several have survived such encounters.
What can I do to support law enforcement?
- If you see suspicious activity, dialing 311 (non-emergency) or 911 (emergency) is standard procedure. But be warned: police have been overwhelmed with the number of calls.
- Because of the unlikelihood of armed police response arriving in time, we are marketing Neighborhood Patrol Starter Kits. These contain the basics for coordinating groups of concerned citizens, including:
- Night vision glasses (not goggles — they’re a give-away!)
- Virally Activated Medical Prognosis home testing kits
- Signal whistles
- Prepaid burner phones
- Led-Pype LED flashlights
- Our FREE privacy app (instant messaging that isn’t stored anywhere!)
- Our FREE logbook app for your mobile device
- NOTE: We are a licensed Federal Firearms Dealer, and we deliver!
How are the President and Congress addressing the vipe threat?
- Representative Jack Cudge (F-AZ) has introduced H.R. 515, the Mandatory Vampire Virus Reporting Act. This bill would remove doctor-patient confidentiality in the case of EBL-4 and require doctors to notify a new department in the Center for Disease Control answerable to the FBI’s Bioterrorism Joint Task Force. It’s opposed by the Solar Citizens party (of course).
- Senators Kristal Rowan (F-MN) and Wesley McClelland (R-LA) are co-sponsoring S. 1041, the VIHPS Containment Act, which would provide for the creation of “secure hospital facilities capable of holding up to a minimum of 2,000 persons each,” where people infected with VIHPS can be imprisoned.
- Representative Blake Schiff (F-WV) has put forth H.R. 1103, the Vampire Quarantine Act, which would supply TSA and ICE agents with assay tests to be used at airports and the border. Every positive result would go into a central database and the vipes can then be put on the no-fly list. Agents could then direct international vipes back to their own country or hold them if they turn violent. You want to see what a vampire rampage looks like at 30,000 feet? No? Support this bill.
- Because trying to get four squabbling parties to agree on anything is probably a lost cause, there is a petition at www.whitehouse.gov/Petitions/StopTheVipes for the President to sign an Executive Order to declare a state of emergency and designate a department of Homeland Security to deal specifically with VIHPS. This would have the benefit of getting around the Posse Comitatus Act, which is some stupid loophole that means the President can’t mobilize the military to go house-to-house like we really need done.
What about the courts?
In case you’ve been living under a cobblestone in Amish country for the last month, there’s been a lot.
Morgan Lorenz, a vipe lawyer in northern Virginia, is suing the Benjamin Rush Health Initiative for wrongful infection, willful and wanton conduct, and medical negligence. BRHI has responded by moving to dismiss on lack of standing, claiming the changes VIHPS wreaks in a human brain makes the infected no longer Homo sapiens. And the Constitution only applies to humans.
Lorenz v. BRHI matters. If it goes to the Supreme Court, it will matter a lot.
I want to march to show my support!
Our calendar of events features many rallies for a Vipe-Free America!
- August 22nd — The March For Blood
- Albert V. Bryan Courthouse, 401 Courthouse Square, Alexandria, VA
- American Red Cross, 11355 Ohio Avenue, Los Angeles, CA
- American Red Cross, 520 W 49th St, New York, NY
- American Red Cross, 9230 Watson Rd, St. Louis, MO
- American Red Cross, 2640 Canal St., New Orleans, LA
- September 26th & 27th — Not an Inch, Not a Drop
- Albert V. Bryan Courthouse, 401 Courthouse Square, Alexandria, VA
- Center For Disease Control and Prevention, 1600 Clifton Rd., Atlanta, GA
- CDC Quarantine Station, Tom Bradley Int. Airport, 380 World Way, Los Angeles, CA
- CDC Quarantine Station, Philadelphia Int. Airport, 8000 Essington Ave, Philadelphia, PA
- CDC Quarantine Station, San Diego Int. Airport, 3851 Rosecrans St., San Diego, CA
- October 17, 18, & 19 — The Vipe-Free America March
- National Mall, Washington, DC
- United Nations, 1st Ave./U.N. Plaza, New York, NY
- State Capitol, 1315 10th St, Sacramento, CA
- Federal Building, 50 United Nations Plaza, San Francisco, CA
- Federal Building, 11000 Wilshire Boulevard, Sawtelle, CA
- State Capitol, 301 S 2nd Street, Springfield, IL
- Federal Building, 230 South Dearborn St., Chicago, IL
- State Capitol, 400 S Monroe St, Tallahassee, FL
- State Capitol, 100 N Capitol Ave, Lansing, MI
- State Capitol, 1 E Edenton Street, Raleigh, NC
- State Capitol, 600 Charlotte Ave, Nashville, TN
- State Capitol, 1000 Bank St, Richmond, VA
- State Capitol, 416 Sid Snyder Ave., Olympia, WA
- State Capitol, 1100 Congress Ave, Austin, TX
- Federal Building, 1919 Smith Street, Houston, TX